Autumn Cottage Diarist

Taking Solace in Gardens

Lots of changes going on for me - probably good for me if only I could
see the wood for the trees - but at the moment, the trees cast long shadows.

So I do what I've done before - I take refuge in gardens - my own - my friends, any garden that will have me. I get down close to the earth, to dig, and plant, and not think too much - other than where the next planting will be sited.

And I visit other gardens...the first images here are taken on a walk around the village of Blewbury in Oxfordshire -
it's difficult not get inspiration and solace from the peace and beauty of an ancient English village in June.

I've been trying to do a lot of work in Autumn Cottage garden around the pond this weekend (though the bug which has plagued me since returning from Portugal is still not gone, so "work" in the garden has consisted of 15 minutes work and five minutes rest/collapse!). Raining today, so not so much done, as the weedy area - the last to get a layer of bark chippings, has already hardened, making it difficult to pull the weeds. The showers will moisten it - I should be able to do more tomorrow.

  On Friday, I spent an "R&R" afternoon with my dear friend Liz. We "mooched" around the local Antiques Centre, (where I found a carved screen and the Italianate pottery cornucopia of vegetables that now sits as a "bit of fun" in the garden) - had a nice pub lunch surrounded by
hanging baskets and overflowing tubs of flowers, and then returned to her house and garden.

It's the sort of house and garden that make me rush home and wield the planting fork again! Here are some images of the afternoon to enjoy while I wait for the rain to stop :-)

Thorns Around the Heart - Roses Round the Door

Haunted by too many ghosts to stay inside right now, so this afternoon, to Avebury - site of the striking, mystical, prehistoric stone circle in Wiltshire. It was a gloriously sunny day and the village, which sits in the middle of the stone circle, was not too busy with visitors (the numbers of which can become overwhelming at times).

Instead, the only abundance was manifest in the roses which have started to smother the fronts of village cottages and announce that Spring is over and Summer is really here!

I was also able to visit the Henge shop, to pick up a book on dream work and give myself the gift of a lovely Celtic knot necklace to inspire me when working in my journal writing workshops.

I had hoped to visit Avebury Manor and garden, owned by the National Trust - but wouldn't you know it? - today was one of the two days in the week on which it is closed. C'est la vie - means I will have to make another visit sometime soon.

For now, just walk the stones, enjoy the peace and smell the roses with me.

Property Lines

Struggling with some issues at the moment - need to take a few steps from one place in my life to another. This entry  - a page from Melody Beattie's daybook  "The Language of Letting Go" seems particularly wise right now in helping me to keep what action is needed in my foreground.

"A helpful tool in our recovery, especially in the behaviour we call detachment, is learning to identify who owns what. Then we let each person own and possess his or her rightful property.

If another person has an addiction, a problem, a feeling, or a self-defeating behaviour, that is their property, not ours.

If someone is a martyr, immersed in negativity, controlling, or manipulative behaviour, that is their issue, not ours.

If someone has acted and experienced a particular consequence, both the behaviour and the consequence belong to that person.

If someone is in denial or cannot think clearly on a particular issue, that confusion belongs to him or her.

If someone has a limited or impaired ability to love or care, that is his or her property, not ours. If someone has no approval or nurturing to give away, that is that person's property.

People's lies, deceptions, tricks, manipulations, abusive behaviours, inappropriate behaviours, cheating behaviours, and tacky behaviours belong to them too. Not us.

People's hopes and dreams are their property. Their guilt belongs to them too. Their happiness or misery is also theirs. So are their beliefs and messages.

If some people don't like themselves, that is their choice.

Other people's choices are their property, not ours. What people choose to say and do is their business.

What is our property? Our property includes our behaviours, problems, feelings, happiness, misery, choices, and messages; our ability to love, care, and nurture; our thoughts, our denial, our hopes and dreams for ourselves.

Whether we allow ourselves to be controlled, manipulated, deceived, or mistreated is our business.

In recovery, we learn an appropriate sense of ownership. If something isn’t ours, we don’t take it....if we take it, we learn to give it back. Let other people have their property, and learn to own and take good care of what is ours.

Today, I will work at developing a clear sense of what belongs to me and what doesn’t. If it’s not mine, I won’t keep it. I will deal with myself, my issues and my responsibilities. I will take my hands off what is not mine."

May 13^th – Melody Beattie – The Language of Letting Go

(Originally posted June 8th - and still struggling)

Birthday Girl

Summertime has properly returned to Autumn Cottage - just in time to
give Lissie a sunny first birthday! Mistress of all she surveys, she has
decided to patrol her estate today, just checking to see if the Birthday
Bunny has brought her....er....a birthday bunny.

(Unfortunately not a joke, as she is all too adept at catching baby rabbits from the fields all around and bringing them in to me as a floppy gift in her mouth).

Score so far - me (rescued) three - Lissie four... plus goodness knows how many that she has not presented to me.

Also in the garden today, the damsel and dragonflies are starting to
reappear after two weeks cold, wet and miserable weather - methinks its
time for the laptop, kettle and supply of tea and biscuits to return to
the summerhouse!